Teachers, Please Make Self-Care a Priority in the 20-21 School Year

I am writing this post in hopes that, if you are a teacher and you are feeling like I am, you know you are not alone. I know that everyone, no matter what your occupation, has their own stresses and hardships right now...maybe something here will resonate with you. I am by no means stating that teaching is any harder than the work you do. ❤

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Today I made this comment on a friend's post on Twitter:

"This is going to be an emotionally and physically exhausting year but we need to find the joy. We need to show kids how to see silver linings and to have hope. And we need to take time to breathe, be still and refill our own cups."

Here's the thing, school starts in less than 2 weeks and I am already emotionally and physically exhausted. Summer is when teachers refill their cups, a time to rest and recharge. Teachers desperately need this time as we pour their hearts and souls in to our jobs.This year we needed summer recharge more than any other. But this summer was different.

We have been home since March, following all the quarantine rules. Our family has been together so much that my dog now has separation anxiety. My days during "distance learning" were spent on the computer from 7:30 AM-8:00 PM most days helping teachers, students, and parents navigate their way through this new way of teaching and learning. I am NOT whining and complaining, this is my job and I absolutely love it. 

However, we did not sign up to teach online, we had no training. And you can be that a 15 year old would never CHOOSE to take 7-8 classes online. This was forced upon us because of a national health crisis. 

As a result, there were no boundaries teaching from home during a pandemic. Maybe that was my fault.  Maybe I should have set boundaries. But if a student needs help on a Sunday? I can't say no to a student self advocating and asking for assistance. We are not here by choice! It is a PANDEMIC!

There was no bell at the end of the day to remind me "go home and be with your family." I was WITH my family all day. This is to say, we were in the same four walls - and the days blended in to each other...is it Friday? Saturday?  I could not turn my brain off. I could not sleep. 

Oh and did I mention I have an 8 year old son? What was he doing while I was on the computer non-stop? 

Was he sitting at the kitchen table dutifully doing his school work? Sure, for about a week.

Was he completing all the SeeSaw activities assigned? Sorry, no.

Was he reading and practicing math facts? Not without a fight.

Did I give up? Sort of. He was always sitting in the room with me but he was happily building worlds in Minecraft.  I would joke that he was studying "architecture and engineering" but my laugh was a cover. I felt like, and still feel like, I let him down. He watched my put my students first. What message was I sending to my own son?  

Teaching your own child is no joke! This was not homeschooling. It was life in a pandemic. It is NOT what we signed up for so... I had to let some things go. I remember when my son was a baby, I nobly stated that I would not let him play video games until he was 13. And pay to play with is friends online? Oh he can pay for that himself when he gets his own job.  

Guess what?  I broke all of those rules. He has an Xbox. He has Xbox live, he plays online with friends. Because damn it, we are in a pandemic and he could not see his friends. He still has only seen a handful of friends. Honestly, I am in awe of anyone who has more than one child.

The 2020-2021 starts in less than two weeks. School has been out for 2 months. Two months that I am supposed to be making memories with my child, where the sun is shining and the days are light and easy. I was supposed to be refilling my cup. 

Not this summer. Vacations were cancelled. There were no spontaneous day trips. There were no play dates with other children besides cousins (my sister and I have kids close in age...ah a silver lining!) The places we did go - a walk on the beach at 6AM (when no one was there), a trip to the grocery store, getting take out, taking the dog for a walk - was always a surreal production of masks, antibacterial gel and social distancing....what was this doing to my son's mental health as he is now evaluates and fears people who wear their mask incorrectly?

I thought about school every single day this summer. What can I be doing better to help teachers and students? What resources do we need?  Will we be in school? What does the governor say? What are the latest numbers? What about my own son's school? Should we send him? Is it safe? Who would quit their job to stay home with him? Will he not be able to see my aging parents if he returns to school (another silver lining: my parents live close by)? Should we keep him home because it is more important for him to have a connection with his grandparents than to sit in a classroom with a mask trying to learn? What if...What if...What if...?

There are moments I am consumed by the dark tunnel of this pandemic. Five years ago I was in a different dark tunnel. I had cancer, I had to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. I listened to my doctors, went to my appointments, surgeries, and therapies. Each of these steps gave me some semblance of control...I was in control of my destiny getting closer to the light. 

I have no control right now. There is so much happening in our world - the 2020 Election would have been enough to cause me to worry but we are STILL living with a pandemic that has not been controlled in our country.

I am looking for the light and sometimes I can see it. Even when I can't, I pretend I do for my son's sake, for my student's sake, and heck even for my own. Smiling, looking for joy and silver linings, having faith, praying for a better world, and hoping we are closer to the light.  It is all physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting.

Here we are teachers, on the cusp of a school year. We have new schedules, new expectations, new technologies. OH YEAH...and whole new group of students to build relationships with and educate. And depending on what level you teach you might be responsible for anywhere from 12-200 students. You might not even be getting to meet them in person when school starts.

THIS IS HUGE! THIS IS HARD! THIS HAS NOT EVEN HAPPENED YET AND THINKING ABOUT IT IS EXTREMELY STRESSFUL!

Teachers, we have to choose to take care of ourselves, our families, and each other. We are doing the best we can. #WeGotThis - We will continue to go above and beyond for our students. We need to give ourselves permission to do the same for ourselves - to take extra time to breathe, be still and refill our own cups. 

Self-care might be one of the most important lessons our students (and our own children) learn from us this school year. 

Wishing you all the best this school year! ❤

Above image made with Canva.